These are but vain attempts to express, by one who wears her heart on her sleeve. Words, much like love, can be ever elusive... ever frustrating... like trying to paint a million stories on a single canvass. If you will read, please do not ask. Just feel. Or at least try to. The meaning is, whatever you have felt to be there, or the lack thereof :)

Wishing for Angels.


I wished for angels
To hold me within their wings
So I could forget that I have wounds that would not heal
Because you wouldn't speak.
And with every passing moment of silence,
I am cut more deeply.

So I wish for angels
For only  them  could comfort me
Tonight.

31ST December 2001

Overdue.


And silence was my reward
After all the pain
After all the struggle against pride
After all the arguments I've waged
upon this often-reasonable self
Just so I could let you know.

What more should I do?
Wait -
Till I can't wait no more?

You are
Among the questions
I still have to reckon with.


27th December 2001

UNSENT

“Can anyone be so blessed and we so pure that we can offer him tenderness?”
- FRIENDSHIP by Ralph Waldo Emerson-



They are like letters –
Unwritten or unsent,
These thoughts that are
Expressed, yet unvoiced;
Either from lack of courage
From lack of faith
Or from lack of opportunity

But I write them
Though not out of hope that
They would be read
By those to whom they were written for
Rather I write them
That I may, in the least possible way
Remember
That once in my life
Their lives touched mine.


(2001 December 19)

Unsent



They are like letters –
Unwritten or unsent,
These thoughts that are
Expressed, yet unvoiced;
Either from lack of courage
From lack of faith
Or from lack of opportunity

But I write them
Though not out of hope that
They would be read
By those to whom they were written for
Rather I write them
That I may, in the least possible way
Remember
That once in my life
Their lives touched mine.


2001 December 19

DOST



If only for this moment
Let me hold back the sands of time
Imprint these passing images
More clearly into this heart of mine
The longer to hold every hand
The better to see every face
The more intently to listen to every word
The better to communicate, to understand

This heart, it aches like it’s torn apart
From being far away for too long
From the collective warmth of kindred hearts
Of brothers and sisters;   of home




2001 December 12

For my classmates,IV DOST  of PNHS Batch 1998-1999:
In the occasion of our 2001 get-together at Maryliz Mendoza’s residence


 

Conclusion



A part of me, yet not of my blood
That’s what you essentially are.
Someone whose weaknesses are
To be surmounted by my strengths
Whose strengths
Will overcome my own frailties –
A sister: a friend.

This tireless, querying heart
I now lay to rest.
Secure in my belief that
This love, this link is a gift
And I’ll be forever thankful for it,
This blessing that is
You

2001 December 04

Brother.



Then you reached out and held my hand
Told me things no one has told me before
Comforted me with words I’ve often comforted others with
And filled a part of me that longed to be completed

I haven’t known such vulnerability
Not since that night
When you coaxed this inner self to come out
Exposed yet unashamed
Open, yet not naked

I could haBve embraced you
But laughter destroyed the mood
You released my hand, yet
something was left behind for you
And I doubt
If I could ever get it back.

2001 December 04
for A.R. Punzalan

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